I was watching Sex and the City the other day and I realized that as shallow as their relationships may seem on the outside, their friendships are deep. DEEP not because they have once-in-a-while deep conversations, DEEP not because they have the history of growing up in church together, DEEP not because they were forced in a friendship with each other from the days of Mommy-and-Me groups, DEEP not because they happened to be there when one of them was going through a rough patch and it made them realize they were thankful that it wasn't themselves going through it, but DEEP because they are: 1. committed to each others' lives constantly, 2. all successful women in their own prospective fields and are willing to share it with each other, and 3. happy to share in the continued success of their friends.
I want this! I need this! I'm not trying to make some kind of a CLUB for only successful corporate girls, but I realize I need this kind of circle if I am to not feel so isolated amongst my friends while I keep climbing the corporate ladder and am successful at it! I don't want to feel like I have to walk on eggshells around my girlfriends as I share how I've been blessed with awesome perks. I want to feel like my girlfriends are truly happy for me. I want them to feel happy to share in my success as well as wanting to share with me the overflow of their success. I mean I really don't understand why women are so jealous and catty about all this! If your circle of friends are successful, that ultimately leads to your success purely on the basis of overflow! How do we not see this?!?!?!? Why are we all teaming up against each other when we should be sticking together! The corporate world is a man's world still and we women have to fight additional battles that men don't have to (ie.our potential to be objects of sexual desire and diplomatically handling the matter). I'm realizing more so now that I need girlfriends that understand all this and will be there for me through it all... I am tired of being around women who are your friends only when you are on the same or lesser level of success compared to them.
Are we girlfriends really like that? Oh hell yes we are and I'm sure all of us have had the slightest brush with this feeling at one point or another, whether you admit it or not! But that's not the point of this ramble. The point is that I am calling out to all my successful and brilliant women friends to be my girlfriends who will share in my success, share your success with me, and be there to give me countless hours of advice unselfishly to add to my continued success and in turn yours.
Awww Susie...you just wanna rub up on some of us girls...you know, to get the overflow of success ;-) hahaha
ReplyDeleteI am exactly this way with all my friends! And I definitely know the value of having those true friendships where you're loved for who you are, good and bad, and you have that kinda relationship where those chicks can turn to you and say "you're being a slut" and then all laugh about it cause it really doesn't matter and she'd do it too if she could hahaha
I love ya girl! We all just need to make it a point to talk more, reach out when we're feeling down, keep the lines open. CALL when you can't visit in person!!! Stuff like that. And share the burden (if that's what it is) of keeping in touch...back and forth!
Why don't we make it a point to physically get together once a month and shoot the shit without the pressure of calling them "girls nights"...just select a date monthly to get together and do something...anything...even if it's sitting on the floor in Joy's living room passing the bottle around?? hahaha
i hear you. totally. and this is not meant to be a busting-your-balls statement because i've talked to you on 7am ride to work for weeks on. just saying that don't forget the girlfriends that stick by you in the counter-moments, too - when you might not be successful and also those that you don't have to talk about work with.
ReplyDeleteThanks Susan for including me!!! Great piece and insights....Keep sending them over, wish i was there to make it to girls night :(
ReplyDeleteTami: Thanks for reaching out girl! Always love your energy and efforts to reach out, plan, and host settings for us to get together and bond.
ReplyDeleteAnnie: Yes, I recognize and appreciate you for being there for me in all the times I was struggling. Thank you lady! I was mostly venting not about the friends who were not there for me in my hard times, but the ones that seem to be fading slowly away because of my success. I was specifically writing about needing friends who will not feel competitive with me in my success, but be there to share in the joy of it all.
Anonymous: I don't know who you are if you put yourself and anonymous girl! haha
I understand where you are coming from and it's a great perspective, however I feel inclined to add a few point.
ReplyDelete1. Change "successful corporate girls" to read, "successful women"
2.Success can only be measured by how one defines success.
3. Our friendship is DEEP because we are committed to each other, good and bad. We have a DEEP friendship because we celebrate each other's success, victories, etc... We have a DEEP friendship because we fight battles together.
4. Anyone who does not celebrate your happiness is a virus. Get rid of the negativity before it infects your circle of real friends.
Freakin Joy! You are so freaking eloquent I want to kiss you... but I won't.
ReplyDelete